finders keepers

my cat is of the curious variety. i certainly haven't found all the hiding places she frequents. i'm not even sure where she sleeps when i'm at work. (she certainly never sleeps when *i'm* trying to sleep.) but apparently she's been dipping into an alternate universe:



i've never seen either of these necklaces before. they look like something i could (or would) only acquire after showing my tits to passing floats. yet, i came home one day, and the green one was on my floor and the purple one was in my kitchen sink. after freaking out a little - omg, what if people are breaking into my apartment and leaving me cheap plastic jewelry??? - i reached the conclusion that these were somehow left over from the previous occupants.

i thought that was the end of it...until i was making mac & cheese tonight and discovered this on my kitchen floor:



yup.. it's an empty, cat hair-encrusted packet of lube. strawberry kiwi lube, no less. i can't make this shit up. and i'm learning more about my neighbors than i ever really wanted to know.